Change your calendars, it’s June now.

I was in the shittiest mood this weekend, because Google owns the internet, and I reset my password, since I don’t actually remember what it was (meanwhile, my browser, does). This set off a chain of unfortunate events to follow, thus rendering me unable to access my email and Blogger.

Somehow, miraculously, maybe because of the angry email I sent to Google last night (from an address that I actually did have access to), today that problem was finally fixed. Cool.


Anyway! Last night, during all of this havoc, I received an email from someone named Gordon Briggs. Here’s how it’s progressed so far.

Good Day

I am Mr.Peter Wong from Hang Seng Bank Ltd Hong Kong, I have a late client funds of $44.5MUSD in my bank and i need you to front as beneficary and your profit is half of the funds.If interested contact me for more details on

Peter Wong.

Intriguing! Mr Briggs… er, Wong, as it happens, has a proposal for me. Half of 44.5 million dollars… wow. The things I could do with that kind of money. I reply, of course.

Hi I is interest in you moneys. Send me dollars now.

Today in reply I’ve been asked to submit all of my personal details, including full name, address, and a copy of my passport, driver’s license, or “working ID” to Peter Wong, formerly known from his sender tagline as Gordon Briggs. Perhaps my favourite part of the email:

Be informed that the fact that you are a foreigner give you the priviledge to stand in as my deceased client beneficiary as my deceased had no relation all his family died with him during the war and i can not use my relation because its no accepted here in Hong Kong. Also I am very confident that we will be able to establish the trust that is needed to complete this deal and all that I need for the time been is your willingness and commitment so that we can end this in the nxst one weeks.You may not know this but people like myself who have made tidy sums out of comparable situations run the whole private banking sector. I am not a criminal and what I do, I do not find against good conscience, this may be hard for you to understand, but the dynamics of my industry dictates that I make this move. Such opportunities only come ones way once in a life time. I cannot let this chance pass me by, for once I find myself in total control of my destiny. These chances won’t pass me by.

Erm. So yeah, that’s all that’s new with me. Also: Arizona’s… ew.

About Nikki

I've been writing since I was in kindergarten where I Crayola-markered an epic tale of a tiger and a balloon on a stack of lined papers folded into a booklet and stapled along the edge (carefully, and by my teacher). I love DIY, sewing, folksy music, animals and getting out to look at and listen to nature.
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